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Jesus
Each day is forgiving
And never alone
And as we walk
Through the miles of disbelief
It will be his hand that guides you
Leading you home
You carry on
A new day will come
You carry on
A new day will dawn
I am woman
A mountain I will climb
Oh yes I will
I've been beat down and I've been broken
But each day I give it another try
We will carry on
A new day will come
We will carry on
A new day will dawn
I keep singing these words in my head alot lately. I've been struggling alot with my parenting style/ability and have been feeling like the hugest failure ever. This past weekend I was in Lake Tahoe with the ladies from our church for our retreat and I broke down. Sometimes I feel alone, that no one knows what I'm going through and that my girls will resent me for the way I've raised them. Then I play this song.....
Pretty self explanatory!
6 comments:
Hey Michelle, I love this post becuase it is soooo real. Being a mom is so hard. The hardest thing is that no one knows the whole reality of life with your kids in your home and no two moms have the same combination of issues. I've only been doing this for 2 1/2 years and already I worry that I've damaged thier little souls. We live with such guilt as mothers. I think it comes from the over abundance of information that slams us one way then the other. Don't do this, you have to do this....it really never ends. How easy would have been to raise a kid, three, even two generations ago when there was no such thing as child psychology...of course there were no such things as disposable diapers and dishwashers either...trade offs!
In any case, even with Elizabeth as young as she is, when I do something I know I shouldn't have (usually yelling) we talk about it later. I never appologize for the emotion, but the action. It helps her to know that it's okay to make mistakes, everyone does, we just have to work to make it right. And it's never wrong to feel sad, scared, mad, frustrated...
Hang in there...we're all in this mom thing together. Love ya girl!
Hi Michelle, I have been practicing this mommy thing for 18 years now and I often have days when I think of all the things I could have or should have done differently. The most important one is that I wish we would have had more fun. From what I remember, you and your girls have your share of fun. We just try to do the best we can, and hope for good results. Mother is the hardest job in the world and I'm not sure that anyone has ever found that perfect balance of fun, discipline etc. But I think that if you are worrying about it then you will do more good than bad.
Ah, I too can identify. I pray every night that He will give me the strength to raise my children with patience and do what's best for them. And when I feel like I are not meeting that, I feel like I am letting down my children, my husband, God, and even my parents who worked so hard to raise me right. Why do I feel that way? None of these people make me feel that way. I just do.
It is even harder as a step parent for me, because you love them like your own child but you are limited in what you can do, and when you make a parenting mistake, the guilt is even more.
I am glad to hear that you have a group of people you can share with who can help and understand, that is a blessing. You are not alone, although that doesn't always help.
Stay strong, you are doing a great job!
i feel like that ALL the time...you are not alone! we are doing the best we can...and we all make mistakes, but we ARE the BEST Mommy's to our kids..and i know you love those girls more than ANYTHING else...
keep trusting. :)
Keep looking up! A wise woman once told me that "my bathroom door has a lock, use it...and the telephone is always within reach, use it"
I should clarify, use the lock on the bathroom door to get a time out for you, not for locking the kids in, tempting as it may be.
Remember, I've been there, use the phone, or drive over!
Hey Michelle~ I think all Mom's can relate. We want the best for our kids, and want them to have the perfect Mom! But we aren't perfect. I think it's completely normal to feel guilty as Moms, wanting to be perfect.
I love the song you posted and ultimately our little ones are great gifts from God, and just keep praying for Jesus to give you wisdom and a little grace! LOL It is a tough job to be a Mom - to do the work, being there as the major multi-tasker, driving them all around, dressing them, shopping fo rthem, thinking of them all day - and then trying to do it all stress free!! You are not alone in that boat!
Thanks for sharing your feelings honestly!
D
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